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Friday, March 27, 2009

Sharon Speak

I have been with my wife Sharon for seven years. We dated one year, we were engaged for a year and we have been married for five years. As a result of the time I have spent with Sharon, I am now bi-lingual. I know English and I have learned “Sharon Speak. Here are some examples of this unusual language

Means “yes”

Means “no” unless she later thinks through it and it may mean “yes” but I won’t realize this until much later

Means “no” or sometimes “maybe”. It never means “yes”.

I am not certain what this means because I have not heard her utter this word

I wasn’t watching
When I ask her what a particular golf swing of mine looked like, she usually responds with this. It means “It looks pathetic”.

I will be ready in about 2 Minutes
Means 15-20 minutes

Go ahead and go without me
Means you better shut up and wait for me if you know what’s good for you

No, you don’t have to go with me
Means “You better come with me and why would you even ask me that?”

These are just a few examples of this unusual language. Not only do you have to interpret the words spoken, you need to consider body language, tone, volume and eye responses.

This language is one of the hardest languages to learn, right behind Mandarin Chinese.


  1. You are somewhat of a slow learner, but do seem to be picking up the language and maybe in a another decade or so you maybe able to understand it completely but I doubt you will be able to speak fluently.


  2. P.S. We dated for two years and were engaged for one. Stand corrected.