I try to be easy going, I try to live and let live. I am not a horn honker while driving. However, there are a number of things that just drive me nuts.
I use my cell phone often and it is a wonderful tool. But, I could live without:
Cell Phone Use in Restaurants. If someone is sitting near me in a restaurant talking to a dinner companion, it is no problem for me. Part of the enjoyment of a meal is the conversation that goes with it. But sit me next to someone at a restaurant who is talking on the phone and I go crazy. I want to grab his cell phone throw it as far as I can and then push his head in his food. If he has something important to talk about on the phone, leave the restaurant.
Cell Phone Use When the Plane Lands. I have practiced law for 32 years and have had many business trips and personal trips during that time. Beginning 6 or 7 years ago, people have gone overboard with phone calls when the plan lands. You know what I am talking about. The plane hits the runway and the flight attendant announces you can now use your cell phone. As soon as that announcement is made, 60 of the 80 people on board need to make a phone call. We have been in the plane for 90 minutes or less and ¾ of the people on board have such important thing going on or events that must be attended to that they have missed during the previous 73 minutes so now they have to make a phone call before we get into the terminal. Who are these people? Is it a flight full of bookies or stock traders (oh I forgot, they are same aren’t they)? Are they calling the cops to see if their kidnapped daughter has been found? For gosh sakes what is so important that they can’t wait 4 more minutes. It makes me want to hit them with one of those little airplane pillows.
Cell Phone Use in the Library. I go to the library often. Cell phone use is epidemic in the library. My mother taught me to be quite and respectful in the library. I was in two different libraries today. In the first one, a man was talking loudly on a cell phone about what he needed to buy at the store. In the other library there were two phone talkers talking about who knows what, but they both very loud. Listening to both of them reminded me of listening to the dueling banjo’s song where there is an instrumental duel between a guitar and banjo. Da Da Da Da Da Da; DA DA DA DA DA DA DA.
I can live without the guy in the car in the next lane who, as you are approaching the stop light, sees that there is one car ahead in his lane and no cars ahead in your lane. So what does the chowder head do? He speeds up, cuts in front of you and then has to slam on his brakes because he only has only 60 feet before he hits the stop light. Now he is in front of you and you are stopped at the light behind him. Does he not have a clue that this may be rude? I have been driving for 41 years and this has pissed me off for my entire driving career. It makes me want to have a special power where I can pull up next to him point my finger at his tire so that he can see me, flick my finger and cause his tire to explode. Kind a like Samantha in Bewitched. Point at another tire and it explodes and so on until he is sitting on his rims. Then I would smile, wave, pull in front of him and pleasantly drive off. A similar situation is the guy who speeds up, pulls in front of you and then has to immediately turn right at the next corner. Why didn't he just get behind you? My special finger power (not not the middle finger, I don’t do that) would be used on his tires also.
I can live without Sara Palin. This woman is a perfect politician for a Lindsey Lohan- Paris Hilton society; a society that has no substance. A society where image is far more revered than deeds. This woman in the queen of the intellectual desert. She hasn’t read anything including her own book. You know people just like her. People who blame everyone but themselves for losses, mistakes or miscues. She blames the McCain staff for her terrible campaign performance. She blames Katie Couric for asking her questions she could not answer. Please put her on a talk radio show and let her do and say whatever she wants. Let her work out of the same studio in Miami that Rush Limbaugh works out of. Then when she leaves works, she can see Cuba.
I can live without Barney Frank. Although there are some things Barney and I agree on, I can live without him based upon his manner, his attitude and just the way he looks. He ought to be a police detective assigned to missing persons. Or he ought to be frying eggs in Philly as a short order cook.
I am tired of these politicians and fringe lunatics on both the left and the right who refuse to consider that people do have different opinions. (My opinions on Sara Palin and Barney Frank are irrefutable so don’t comment in favor of those people. I am right on this and I refuse to listen to contrary opinions. If you feel otherwise, start your own blog). Utah is filled with people who believe that if you don’t believe like they believe, not only are you wrong, you are evil. Wellllll, I can live without these people.
Ok, I am done. I am going to have a glass of wine, read an anger management book and settle down. By the way, I can live without those bozos who write anger management books.
Recently Read Books
- A Delicate Truth- John Le Carre (fiction)
- Perfect - Rachel Joyce (Fiction)
- The Expats - Chris Pavone (Fiction)
- An Event in Autumn - Henning Mankel (Fiction)
- Winter in Madrid - C.J.Sansom (Fiction)
- The Brothers - John Foster Dulles and Allen Dulles - non-fiction
- LIfe Among Giants - Bill Roorbach (Novel)
- Empty Mansions - Bill Dedman (non-fiction)
- Woodrow Wilson (non fiction)
- Lawrence in Arabia (Non-Fiction)
- In Sunlight and In Shadow by Mark Helpren (Fiction)
- Lesson in French - Hilary Reyl (fiction)
- Unbroken- Laura Hillenbrand (Non-Fiction)
- Venice, A New History- Thomas Madden - (Non- Fiction)
- Life is a Gift - Tony Bennett Autobiography
- The First Counsell - Brad Meltzer (Fiction)
- Destiny of the Republic - President James Garfield non-fiction by Candice Millard
- The Last Lion (volume III)- William Manchester and Paul Reid (non-fiction, Winston Churchill)
- Yellowstone Autumn -W.D. Wetherell (non-fiction about turning 55 and fishing in Yellowstone)
- Everybody was Young- (non-fiction Paris in the 1920's)
- Scorpion - (non fiction US Supreme Court)
- Supreme Power - Jeff Shesol (non-fiction)
- Zero day by David Baldacci ( I read all of Baldacci's Books)
- Northwest Angle - William Kent Krueger (fiction - I have read 5 or 6 books by this author)
- Camelot's Court-Insider the Kennedy Whitehouse- Robert Dallek
- Childe Hassam -Impressionist (a beautiful book of his paintings)
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Things I Can Live Without
Posted by Bud Headman at 12:39 AM
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HILARIOUS and all true!ReplyDelete